Despite my strong non-violence stance, there were times this summer I wanted to clock Pharrel upside his happy little head, with a swift and efficient backhand. Bam.
Yes, because he had the nerve to sing a song about being happy simply when I wasn’t.
It’s no secret I had a rough summer. Without rehashing all the shitty shits which went down, let’s just say there were entire weeks where I wanted to burrow a hole into the couch, climb in and never come out; well…except to eat, because duh, food. And cheese. Of course cheese gets its own sentence fragment; I suspect no one is shocked by this.
To be perfectly honest, I’m still struggling a bit to find my footing. Most of the things which set my world a kilter many months ago are still present in my life and will be for some time. The bottom line is life can be tough and damned if it doesn’t always play fair, which is why I’ve been working extra hard on ♫ Bringing Happy Back ♫ Them other boys don’t know how to act ♫ because at the end of the day, I’d rather shake my hips to J.T. or even Pharrell than be a couch curmudgeon; not that I wouldn’t happily recline for book reading, television watching and monkey loving. Yeah, you might want to stay away from my sofa. Just kidding, I totally put down a sheet.
Here’s How You Make Happy Work
- Cover the Basics. Food, Water and Sleep. As much as I like to think I’ve advanced past the needs of an infant, I haven’t. Half the time when I’m a Grumpster, not to be confused with a better dressed Hipster, it’s because I’m tired, hungry or dehydrated.
- Do something nice for somebody else. Give them an unsolicited compliment, do them a favor, and more importantly, be kind. There’s a whole world of people out there. It’s good to see past ourselves.
- Get Your Workout On. Regular exercise is like magic fairy dust. When used liberally, it makes you feel good. Even Rooster, my brother’s one-eyed dog, agrees.
- Up your intake of monkey loving…with a partner you care about; obviously. I’m not talking about running around town and getting a reputation. Either way, it’s hard to be angry when you’re getting a little sumthin’, sumthin’. Know what I’m sayin’.
- Kitchen. Dance. Parties. I don’t care if you want to get emo and go the Sprockets route or bust into a country line dance, just let out some energy in a way which makes you feel good.
- Put on a pair of sassy stilettos. Get dressed up and make an effort to look good. Eventually, it will rub off and you’ll feel good too.
- Forgiveness is key. Whatever anger or resentment you’re harboring, even if it’s with yourself, let it go because it’s only holding you back.
- Work Less. This one is hands down the hardest for me. I have a tendency to step up my game by working more and occasionally the extra hours are necessary, but very quickly necessary starts to become the norm and then I turn into cranky pants, so Work Less.
- Speaking of, do more of the things which make you happy. For me, this involves the Hubby, the felines, family, friends, farmers marketing, reading, cooking, baking and blogging.
- Take Time For Yourself without feeling guilty. You deserve it.
- Get grateful. Every day, write down one thing which makes you grateful because a little appreciation will go a long way.
- Meditation. If you would have told me five years ago, I would be promulgating being Zen, I would have snorted until coffee came out my nose. What can I say? It works; I use this this app specifically.
- Focus on the positive stuff happening in your life. I can assure you it’s there somewhere. You have to be willing to look though.
For example, June took me to Utah to meet some fabulous peeps, also known as Blends (cough, cheesy ass name, cough), and I road tripped it to Detroit to see the cousins for the chillest of illest weekends. Yep, it’s like that.
Family bonding was the name of the game in July.
- August was all about my veggie loving, while September brought on the booze.
The truth of the matter is happy isn’t always easy, especially when the chips are down. You have to work for it and you have to do it on the regular too. At the end of the day though, it’s worth it.
A note: Depression is very real and involves a whole lot of scientific brain chemistry I can’t explain, other than to say you cannot simply will yourself to be happy. Talk to someone, see a physician, and get help if need be because everyone deserve some happy in their life.
Do you actively work to stay happy? What tactics do you employ?
Lauren says
Love it : )
Meghan says
Thought you might. I was thinking of you when I wrote it too.
Meghan recently posted…â« Because I’m Happy â«
Lauren says
That makes me happyyyyyyyy
Lucie@FitSwissChick says
I freaking love you more with each post you write on here. I simply want to fly over, give you the biggest #vanillagorilla hug, throw on those fancy stilettos and shake our boootays in the kitchen. We use the peppermill as a microphone and we booze up big time ith a side of salad. And I bring Swiss Cheese.
Meditation saved my life.
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Meghan says
Count me in. You can have the pepper mill, and I’ll use the salt shaker.
Meghan recently posted…â« Because I’m Happy â«
Brittany says
Life is totally shitty at times, but I appreciate the optimistic outlooks people like you have!! I developed one myself after my last big life change. I am now constantly changing my mindset to a happier state and life is so much simpler. Most of the time. 😉
Your summer, though not what you expected, had many wonderful activities. Blends is the cheesiest of all cheesy names, but MAN I WISH I met your ass in person. Just your ass, nothing else.
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Meghan says
I wish my ass had met you too at Blend. That would have totally made the experience for me and my ass.
Meghan recently posted…â« Because I’m Happy â«
caren says
Ugh… funny that we both ended up having shit sandwich summers. But like you, I’m also starting to pull out of it. It’s not that my circumstances have improved, but my attitude toward it has changed a ton.
I struggle with perfectionism and control, big time. Life has handed my butt to me this year, and I’ve humbly accepted the lessons I’ve had to learn which is that ultimately, we don’t control what happens to us most of the time, but we do control how we respond to it. That’s the part I’m working on, and it’s actually making me a little happier not to get caught up in things I can’t control.
Meghan says
You said it. The only thing we can control is our reaction. When something has got me upset, I try to ask myself if this is a) in my control so I have the power to change it (if not, let it go) or b) if this will even be important one week from now (if not, let it go).
I’m rooting for you. Shit sandwich and all.
Meghan recently posted…â« Because I’m Happy â«
Kirsten says
Hey, I’m commenting on a blog in a timely manner, it must be that I’m pulling out of my backlog of to do things.
Love the song. love the song love the song. it’s my first walking tune, of my walking tunes group. Because I’m not all up in Pandora. Too many choices at home, thanks.
Um, lost the train of thought. Still want another komboooooocha peach cider thing.
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Meghan says
I had another kombucha whiskey beer although this one was Raspberry. It wasn’t as good as the peach though, although I did think of you.
Meghan recently posted…â« Because I’m Happy â«
Laura @ Sprint 2 the Table says
I just said this morning that that song makes me want to smack someone. Especially on a Monday.
Happiness… I like to workout. It makes me happy and I think there’s actual science about that. And wine with friends (because you should drink alone). If there isn’t science around that, there should be.
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Meghan says
There is science behind the whole workout business. They call it endorphins and booze. 🙂
Meghan recently posted…â« Because I’m Happy â«
Pip {Cherries & Chisme} says
Some great tips here! So well written as always 🙂 like you say, forgiveness is key. That’s the one I personally struggle with the most, I can be so MEAN to myself, always comparing myself to other people and feeling like I should be doing what they are but I’m ME, that won’t make me happy, doing me things will! Thanks for sharing 🙂
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Meghan says
Comparison is really tough, especially because I suspect you’re comparing yourself to folks where you’d come up short as opposed to those where you’d be soaring. At the end of the day, you have to find happiness within yourself and to hell with what everybody else is doing.
Meghan recently posted…â« Because I’m Happy â«
Sarah Pie says
Petting kitties or in my case puppies is the best medecine, hands down!
I finally downloaded that meditation app… one of these days I’ll get around to opening it and seeing what all this #zengorilla madness is about 🙂
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Meghan says
Yes, try the mediation app and then let me know what you think. My only issue now is Oscar always wants to meditate with me, and by meditate I mean play or jump on me. 🙂
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Arman @ thebigmansworld says
Oh Meg, always see the shining light in the abysmal darkness.
Pharell’s song can STFU but here’s to YOU seeing the happiness and working on that dreaded W word.
I love how pet cats actually made the list.
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Meghan says
Come into the light Carol Anne.
Please tell me you get that reference. If not, I’ll have to bring some horrible horror movies to Toronto for us to watch while we eat all of Davida’s beloved popcorn.
Meghan recently posted…WIAW: A Day In The Life Edition
Charlotte @ Commitness to Fitness says
This might be one of my favorite posts 🙂 Yes to doing something nice to others, being grateful, high heels and kitchen dance parties!! (well, yes to all of them, but especially those) im having one of those days (weeks, really) where i just want to bury myself in the couch, but you’re right, I too prefer dancing 🙂
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Meghan says
Dance it out baby, dance it out.
I hope your week has gotten better. I’m rooting for you in my sassy stilettos, while simultaneously dancing a chorus line. Alright that might be a bit much, but you get the idea.
Meghan recently posted…WIAW: A Day In The Life Edition
Juli @1000lovelythings says
I wish I could just give you the biggest bear hug ever right now. Maybe you should “being awkwardly hugged by a stranger” add to your list. Or at least that gave you a chance to practice forgiveness…
Thanks for outlining such a feasible happiness strategy! Sometimes sadly it’s too easy to just cuddle up like an embryo, shut out the whole world and singing the blues. Sometimes life throws us a curve ball, sometimes even a few in a row but what really makes the difference is our attitude. It’s totally okay to be very sorry for ourselves for a certain time but then we have to get up again, adjust our crowns and work for our happiness.
I felt a little sad for no particular reason lately. Thanks for reminding me that even a good book can make me ridiculously happy sometimes. I’ll work a little less this weekend and just cuddle up with a novel!
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Meghan says
I did the embryo thing for a while (I love the imagery by the way), and it’s time for me to do more practical things or else I’ll never leave the couch! Plus my crown was started to get a bit off kilter.
I love that you’re going to work less this week and curl up with a book instead. I may do the same this afternoon.
Meghan recently posted…WIAW: A Day In The Life Edition
Davida @ The Healthy Maven says
The second Fall hits I am back on the yoga train! As soon as the weather goes to shit aka not summer I get all introspective and zen buddha and yoga and I befriend each other once more! If only they did seasonal yoga memberships…
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Meghan says
My studio actually allows you to pay 10 class passes, which is enough to get me through the season. It’s a pretty genius idea. You should talk to the folks at your place. Get them on board.
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Fran@BCDC says
Meghan, this is a very moving post and I’m sorry I missed it when you originally posted it. I know that I sometimes feel like pouring everything out on my blog when I’m upset or down about something. That’s the way I was last winter. I was so sad and in so much pain and I really thought I was a goner. I’ve been so lucky to have the chance to have this surgery. There are still major issues and stumbling blocks in my life and some days I want to pull my hair out. But I’m not in pain and that’s such a gift. You are such a positive spirit. That’s how you come across to me anyway. I feel like you are a good friend and I’m so happy (oops, there’s that word!) to have met you. I do feel that I know you as if I could walk out my door, cross the street and visit you. You are funny and generous and I’m glad I know you.
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Meghan says
I wish you would walk out your door, across the street and come visit me. That would be nice, and I have just the diner I would take you to. 🙂
I’m happy you enjoyed this post and even more so you’re in a better place now, mentally and physically. It’s hard to be happy and it takes a lot of work when the chips are down, but dammit it’s so worth it.
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