I consider myself to be an expert in many fields.
Oh and by expert, I mean self-created validation. There’s no schooling or really anything to support my conclusion, aside from own ego. A contrary presentation of all things factual and scientific – hello boring- has not held back my own creative imagination; not when it comes to wisdom. You see, I am a fount of knowledge and a wealth of information and today, I want to share it with all of you.
Before I inflict upon you my pearls of wisdom, you should know I obtained my street smarts from the school of hard knocks. Despite the rainbows and unicorns which make up the majority of my formative years, I also had my share of tumultuous experiences growing up and even in early adulthood. Some days, weeks, and events were not always a walk in the park. Life changing health scares will do that to you, although as a result, I learned some valuable life lessons.
And away we go.
Stop and smell the roses; or even the rosemary.
Go to the grocery store hungry. It’s when you buy all the good stuff.
Don’t be a douche bag, an asshat or a racist, which are pretty much the same thing.
Laugh. A lot. Laugh some more. Laugh so much it hurts and you spit your drink out through your nose and across the table.
Cook with fresh herbs whenever possible. It makes a world of difference.
Instead of greed, practice gratitude.
Be willing to change.
Ten pounds only matters if it impacts your health.
Never leave cheese unattended. Not if you want it to be there when you get back.
Work smarter, not harder.
Be open to others and their ways, unless of course they’re a homicidal maniac and then I suggest you run in the opposite direction. Fast.
Be goofy. Be silly. Make a fool of yourself. It builds character.
Lick the beater. Never the knife.
Love yourself for who you are at this very moment.
Red toenails are always sexy.
If it’s not going to matter in a week or next month, don’t let it bother you now.
Invest in a good quality knife. It will save you hours in the kitchen.
Keep your friends close.
Don’t keep your enemies closer. Instead, get them out of your life.
Buy extra bananas. Turn the leftovers into baked goods.
Ask for help when you need it.
Live within your means.
Wear two pairs of socks in the winter. It will help keep you warm.
Eat lots of veggies.
Show everybody respect. They don’t need to earn it. You’re not the Dalai Lama, well unless of course you actually are, in which case, “Welcome, I’m honored you read my blog.”
Meditate (That one’s for you D.L. Can you I call you D.L.? Let’s be besties, m’kay.).
Recycle. It’s the right thing to do.
If you see a sunset, take five minutes and watch the hell out of that thang.
Don’t take a bad day out on those around you.
Never piss into the wind. This was the Hubby’s two cents. I can’t vouch for this one, but it sounds solid.
Last, although certainly not least, eat pancakes for breakfast. Stuff them with sweet potatoes, cauliflower, cheese and spinach.
To be clear, while I preach all of these things, I don’t always practice them, although I do try, especially the eat lots of veggies bit. It’s good to be a work in progress.
What pearls of wisdom would you offer?