Sometimes I can get in my own way.*
I know, I know it’s hard for me to believe too.
*Laura used this same phrase earlier this week, so she might be partially responsible for my epiphany, or at the very least the verbiage prattling around my over-active brain.
As stubborn as I can be, it’s even harder for me to admit.
Before I get to the “how” surrounding my first sentence, I have a few words to share first. Of course I do, and by few I mean a lot, so grab a cup of coffee or your beverage of choice and get comfortable.
I am head of over heels for my weekly food share and completely enamored with my newly acquired deep freezer.
You wouldn’t know it by coming here though, since I’ve gone mum on the topic of my CSA. Whenever I sit down to write about my wonderful weekly haul, my usual witty and inappropriate banter escapes me, and when I stop being inappropriate, something is seriously wrong.
Some of you might have assumed the veggies got the best of me this year. Maybe I’d had enough. Hell, maybe it was too much to handle without the Hubby around to help. Or maybe I’m just done to death with produce in general. It would be a good guess in light of my recent silence, but an incorrect one, nevertheless.
Simply put, I love getting my CSA share. Right after being reunited with the Hubby, it’s the highlight of my week. There are folks who will think this is crazy or my priorities are all wrong (chances are they aren’t food bloggers) but different things makes different people happy, and my weekly farm share makes me ridiculously happy.
I get beautiful, bountiful, produce on a weekly basis. All kinds of produce too, which has not only kicked my creativity into overdrive, it’s forced me to buy a deep freezer from a complete stranger on Craigslist. Yes, the kind big enough to story a body; not that I’m into that kind of thing.
I also love investing in our farmers, and I do mean the actual people, not some monolith corporation pushing cheap food-like products; bunch of shady fuckers that group. Sorry, the last bit just slipped out, but it’s good to see my inappropriate self make an appearance.
Every time I sign up for my another round with my CSA (winter produce, here I come), every time I select an “add-on” to my weekly order (hello farm fresh eggs), every time I go the farmers market, and every time I sing their praises, I am advocating for change in our current food culture. I am literally putting my money where my mouth is. Quite frankly, aside from the Hubby’s overpriced, although worth it, education and the roof over my head, it’s the only place I’m putting my money these days, and I wouldn’t change it for anything.
When it comes to managing the sheer volume of produce we receive on a weekly basis, I’m not even the slightest bit concerned. I’m on year three now, and I’ve realized, I’ve got this shit. I’m owning my CSA, so much so I’m buying more vegetables at farmers markets, I’m berry picking, and I’m happily accepting all garden bounty from friends, family and coworkers. The sight of mass quantities of fruits and veggies littering my counters or crisper drawers no longer intimidates me. Oh, who am I kidding? We all know they are neatly lined up and sorted in order of age. I eat you in the order I receive you, unless something’s about to go bad because spoilage takes precedence.
Even though I haven’t been saying it much, I want you to know I love my veggies and I love what I’m supporting by getting them.
So I started this post oh so long ago by saying, “Sometimes I can get in my own way.”
I often joke about my self-diagnosed OCD, being a planner, and a list lover, and while there are some great benefits to all of these (even the OCD), it’s possible I can overcomplicate things as well. Now it doesn’t happen often (cough, cough), but it’s definitely happened where my CSA posts are concerned.
It started with a plan and perhaps a certain someone’s unwillingness to deviate from said plan (I’m looking at…well me, crap). My plan was to share my weekly haul and then detail how every morsel got eaten because it’s one thing to get the food, and it’s another to actually use it. It’s a sound idea, but it’s not working for me anymore.
Honestly if you saw what I turned it into, you’d be shocked.
I started making lists of each week’s share. Easy enough.
Then I started adding to these lists exactly how each item got used because I was going through so much produce (practically every meal) that I could barely keep track of what gotten eaten and how. Did the tomatoes from week five go into another batch of Tomato Pesto? Perhaps I made a Pasta Sauce, which went right into the deep freezer or maybe they were turned into a Caprese Salad. Was my Gazpacho from the week seven tomatoes or the week eight tomatoes? And god forbid I actually combine produce from two different weeks. How do I account for it? (Side note: This happened all the time. It’s suppose to happen and it means you’re doing something right if your produce is overlapping).
Trying to document every single morsel with pen, paper and even a camera got to be overwhelming and exhausting. It was almost as bad as that time I tracked my food for a lovely reader.
Despite the fact, I’ve been getting busy in the kitchen, I simply stopped writing about my weekly food share. Then I stopped making CSA lists altogether (aside from my deep freezer list; that is an important list to have) and one week I didn’t even photograph from veggies. Gasp.
What this means is while I can tell you I ate a phenomenal grilled cheese sandwich two nights ago for dinner, where CSA peaches made an appearance, I can no longer tell you what week those peaches relate to. I do know the sandwich was amazing, and that’s all that really matters.
The very short end to this extremely long tale is I’m switching up my CSA ways. I am going to share my produce in all it’s glory because I do love my fruits and veggies, but I’ll be doing it in a less structured format.
I am getting out of my own way now. Excuse me, while I step aside.
How do you get in your own way? How to get out of it too?