Dear Mother Nature,
I implore you to come to your senses and realize this winter stuff is for the birds.
Honestly, I’ve had enough. If you need me to come right out and say it, then fine, I’ll say it:
You win.
I concede. I’m waving my white flag or really my twelve winter hats, six pairs of gloves, three sets of socks and double all other clothing because that’s how many layers I have to wear when I leave the house.
I’ll admit it. You win.
I’m tired of seeing this outside my front door.
Now please take your single digit temperatures, in March no less (negative if you’re rocking Celsius) and go already. If you need help packing, shoot me a text because I’m your girl.
I’d be more than happy to roll the red carpet back to Antarctica or wherever it is you depart to when winter isn’t here. Hell, if you want to hang out in the sewers with Pennywise the Clown, that’s cool; I don’t judge, just so long as it means YOU. AREN’T. HERE.
I don’t mean to sound harsh, but I can’t take anymore. I’m done with you. I’ve had more than my fair share of winter, and I’m absolutely ready to come out of hibernation. In fact, I need to come out of this cave where I spend my nights and weekends because honestly I’m going borderline stir crazy, trapped with three felines, who want outside worse than I do. We’re only a week away from them eating one another and once that’s done, they’ll probably start in on me.
These are the eyes of cat about to go crazy, while Max is in the background battling his depression. It’s rough being an all black cat.
I realize there’s probably some blips left in the road: some blustery weather, some fifty mile an hour winds, and even a few more snow showers. In the meantime though, I need a sign. Something to rest my hopes on, something that says the end is near, something that means the cats won’t eat me.
Please….You Win.
I’m ready for Spring.
- I want to see green grass again, and I don’t mean the patch I accidentally snowblowed.
- I’m ready for crocuses to spring up, followed shortly thereafter by daffodils and tulips.
- I want to hear the birds sing; I’ll even take the damn neighborhood woodpecker who wakes us all up at 5 a.m. Alright scratch that last bit, you can leave him in Florida.
- I want to eat springtime vegetables again.
Confession: I ate these for dinner last week.
- I want to sleep with the window open, while a nice gentle breeze caresses my face.
- I want to pull my peep toed pumps out of storage and rock some toe cleavage. You never know how many years my feet have left, so I have to take advantage while I can.
- I’m ready to wear tank tops someplace other than the gym.
Shameless Selfie.
- I want to dig in the dirt, even if it means my nails will never be the same.
- I want to pick up my first CSA offerings of the season.
- I want to eat Heirloom tomato salads and sop up the juices with delicious bread.
- I’m even ready to find headless chipmunks at the back door, presents from my fighting, frisky felines.
- I’m ready to eat gelato, without the fear of being frostbitten.
- I’m ready to try this running business again.
- Truly, I just want to sit outside in a sun patch, drinking beet juice mimosas and making my lists.
Look Mother Nature, I know I’m asking a lot. It’s a tall order, and I can appreciate that, but I’m asking nevertheless. Please send this Winter Shit away and bring on the Spring. I’d be forever grateful. Thanks.
What signs of Spring do you want to see the most? What are you looking forward to doing outside? What are you looking forward to eating? If Spring doesn’t come soon and you live in a warm climate, how do you feel about house guests that come with cats?
I’m looking forward to eating garlic scapes. Oh wait, I’ve still got some garlic scape pesto in the freezer. Ok, I’m looking forward to eating strawberries. Wait, got some of them in the freezer as well. Salad? I’ve been buying lettuce and having salads each week. I suppose I must go to the default setting of a tomato sandwich.
Yes, I want a tomato sandwich. With basil, avocado, and mozzarella on sourdough bread.
I’ll console myself with fresh tomato pesto, because I’ve barely scraped the surface of the jars in my freezer.
I have garlic scape pesto in my freezer too, and I’m holding off on eating it until you publish that garlic scape recipe. Hurry up..cough, cough.
OMG, I am SO there with you. I’m done. I’m over it, I’ve been over it, time to move along winter! That picture of the heirloom tomato salad has me drooling, just think…it will all taste that much better when it does actually arrive, someday… 🙂
That tomato salad will taste like sweet victory, especially if eaten in a sunpatch.
Can I co-sign this letter? BEtter yet, let’s start a petition. I’m ready to be sweaty and covered in dirt. On the ball field… where was your mind?!
You know where my mind went! Dirty birdie.
Let’s get this petition started.
So I shouldn’t make you jealous by pointing out that despite our horrendous season of winter storms, we’ve finally been given a bit of a break over here in the form of clear sunny (but frosty) skies, blackthorn and plum blossom, crocus and daffodil flowers popping up everywhere? No? Okay then 😛
In all seriousness, I hope you all get a break over there soon! <3
No please tell me more about the crocus and daffodils. I will happily live vicariously through you until I get to see my own.
Is there a petition we can sign to get spring to come? Because my name is going to be first on that damn list.
We may have to tango over that number one spot. I bet a lot of people will be fighting to sign that thing.
To me not to understand you because in my city already there is no snow… Forgive 😉 Bad things about spring – will be very much damp and untidily. But I am ready to suffer. And most of all I wait for the termination of spring. Because there will be a SUMMER!
No forgiveness necessary. Just live it up a little more for me, ok? Soak in a sun patch.
Thankfully I don’t have snow in my state..I would legit kill if I did. We’ve been having a shitton of rain though..and I am done with it. DONE I tell you. I have started hearing birds..which is an amazing sign. Then it will pour buckets, which makes me angry. I am soooo ready for spring. I say we pack up the cats, get in the car, and drive ourselves to Florida. Max and Little (my black cat) can battle in the back seat for sexiest man alive.
It’s a deal, although Max will probably try to eat Little. He’s got a comsumption addiction.
Trust me I feel you… you can’t see our mailbox (AGAIN) after our brief snowfall this weekend. It’s March, I’m over it, mother nature clearly missed the message on this one. All of the tings you’ve listed sound amazing and are just making me more and more anxious for when this white stuff finally melts… though we’re supposed to get more here again this weekend 🙁
It’s snowing again today. Yuck!! I’m afraid my letter didn’t work. 🙁
You are most certainly welcome to come avec a cat.
Mother Nature must have had half a tonne of rosemary salt the other day, because lately, it’s been peeing down rain like CRAZY. IN SUMMER.
Link me back to this post in 3 months time.
Can I still come if I bring three cats?
Tomatoes!!! How I miss in season tomatoes! I only recently learned I can eat them raw with salt (I used to ask for no tomatoes on everything!). Seriously I just want to be able to drive to work without sliding all over the road. Or run around the nearby trail without dying. I’m not asking much!!
As always, I love your writing. <3
As always, I love your compliments on my writing. Does my ego good. 😉
I don’t think we’re asking too much either. Running without sliding and potential death should be a prerequisite. I hope your weekend weather is better than mine right now (more snow).
The weather WAS much better, but that didn’t stop me from falling on the ice when I attempted my first outdoor run in months. Spring better come soon!!
Oh no! I hope you came out on top. 😉
I’m not sure I can give in yet… It’s starting to feel a little warmer. But then I read about a new winter storm we are supposed to be getting? 🙁 The thought is just too depressing right now.
I like being able to step outside and not cringe against the cold. I like feeling the sun on my face. And then everything you mentioned above. Beautiful letter. I hope Mother Nature listens and responds accordingly.
I think it may have worked it’s way up into the fifties yesterday, and tomorrow we’re expecting snow. Depressing indeed.
Not being able to cringe against the cold is huge. I would like that too.
Well, we’ve had a couple of spring-LIKE days here…and we’re most certainly out of the single digit temps but with as unpredictable as Tennessee weather can be, there’s no telling what we’re in store for next week. So come on down, bring the cannibalistic kitties, a jacket AND a swimsuit…you never know! Ha!
And I’m sorry, I just have to say…would all this winter stuff really be for the birds if they’re the smart ones who fly SOUTH?! 😉
Since we are forecasted to get more SNOW today, consider my bag packed and the cats too. Basically, I’m going to take a cue from the birds, and I’ll be right there.