Since becoming a parent, crow has become a regular in my meal rotations.
Everything I thought I knew or believed has been abandoned along with any rational thoughts, which to be honest were few and far between anyway. Instead, my brain has been taken over by zombies with coffee as it’s main food source; well caffeine and crow that is.
Case in point, I said I’d never have kids, and we all know how that turned out.
Never say never though, especially where faulty condoms are concerned. I should have known that juicy fruit flavor with textured nubs was just for show; all glitz and glamour with no substance to support it, so to speak.
In any event, I had definite ideas about tiny humans and how I’d raise one if ever things changed. It’s safe to say, all my previous notions were downright ridiculous. Hence, the whole eating crow business.
For example, I used to say I’d let my baby cry it out. Um yeah, it turns out I’m more full of you know what than the tiny dictator’s dirty diapers because when that baby cries, my heart cracks in two and I am instantly at her side.
I use to laugh at people who teared up over sappy videos and now I can sob at the drop of the hat, especially if it’s a really nice hat and it happens to fall in a puddle of mud, and by fall I mean the tiny human chucks it there.
I said I wouldn’t use my boobs as a pacifier. Yeah, you can disregard that. Instead I’m all, “Here ya go kid. You want some fries with that shake.”
I also said I wouldn’t eat meat substitutes. If I was feeling carnivorous, I’d just consume the real deal, and yet here I am making lentil meatballs. Granted this one isn’t really child related, but I’m blaming the hormones so it fits.
The shortest of short versions is I had some leftover lentils in the fridge and a craving for a more meaty meal, without the actual beef. I decided to try my hand at a vegetarian meatball and I’m so glad I did.
These are dense little balls of delight. They’re moist and packed with protein and flavor along with a boatload of garlic because I moonlight as a vampire on weekends. At least that’s what I’m blaming for my pale pallor; that, winter, a lack of sleep and the baby because somehow it all comes back to her.
- 2 1/2 cups cooked Green Lentils
- 1/2 cup Parmesan cheese, shredded
- 3 cloves of Garlic, minced
- 1 tsp. dried Parsley
- 1/2 tsp. dried Basil
- 1/2 tsp. dried Oregano
- 1/4 tsp. Red Pepper Flakes
- 1/2 tsp. dried Onion Powder
- 1/4 tsp. Salt (optional)
- 2 Tbsp. Tomato Paste
- 2 Eggs
- 1/2 cup Breadcrumbs
- Preheat oven to 300 degrees.
- Cook lentils according to package directions.
- Add the cooked lentils, the cheese and all seasonings from the garlic through to the salt to a food processor and pulse until ingredients are broken down.*
- Once broken down, pour lentil mixture into a medium bowl. Add the tomato paste, the two eggs and the bread crumbs. Using your hands, work mixture until it comes together. It will be slightly wet but solid enough to form meatballs with your hands.**
- Place lentil balls on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper.
- Bake for 20 minutes on 300 degrees, flipping them once halfway through at 10 minutes.
- Add to pasta sauce and serve with noodles of choice.
- *If you don't have a food processor, you can mash the lentils with a fork or potato masher in a medium bowl until they are broken down. Then add shredded cheese, minced garlic and seasonings to the bowl.
- **If mixture is too wet, add more breadcrumbs.
Have you ever eaten crow? The proverbial kind. Tell me about it.
im so excited for this recipe!
meredith @ cookie chrunicles recently posted…Giant Slice Of Chocolate Cake & Other Random Stuff (TOL)
I hope you make it. If so, you’ll have to let me know what you think. 🙂
Meghan recently posted…Vegetarian Lentil Meatballs
Oh the things we swore before we became mom’s. Mine: I wouldn’t ignore the dog post kids. I wouldn’t Lady and the Tramp her. And now…I forgot we had a dog until I wrote this P.S. I would eat your cooking sans meat ANY day.
Jamie@TheMomGene recently posted…Momaholics Take Note: It’s Time to Embrace That Non-Mom Side
I’ll trade you some lentil meatballs for some of Charlie’s cupcakes. 🙂
Meghan recently posted…Vegetarian Lentil Meatballs
Mmmmm dense meaty balls.
Okay what is “crow?” I’m feeling very out of the loop here.
But I always love your use of parmesan cheese and red chili flakes. These would be so flavorful.
Cora recently posted…Let’s Get Saucy! Thai Peanut Sauce Recipe (What I Ate Wednesday)
Eating crow basically means you did something you swore you’d never do.
Parmesan and red pepper flakes make everything better.
Meghan recently posted…Vegetarian Lentil Meatballs
JUICY FRUIT FLAVOUR WITH TEXTURED NUBS!?!? Ha ha! For REAL?!?! Nooooo. You’re hilarious! And Meghan, I have eaten so much crow I cough up feathers.
Suzy recently posted…Pregnant and Running: 15 Week Update
Not for real, although I do have an Irish Whiskey flavored condom someone got me as a joke after we found out we were pregnant. 🙂
Meghan recently posted…Vegetarian Lentil Meatballs
Yum! Bring on all of the garlic! As for eating crow… yeah… I don’t think there’s a mom who hasn’t. I just laugh hysterically now when I hear a non-mom start any sentence with “I would never…. blah blah blah.”
Heather Shoberg recently posted…What a week…
True story. No such thing as never anymore. Also, what you swore up and down worked one week ago, no longer works. 🙂 🙂
Meghan recently posted…Vegetarian Lentil Meatballs
These look great! I love using lentils as a meat replacement! they are so “Meaty” I bet these meatballs rock!
Patrick@looneyforfood.com recently posted…Super Creamy Mashed Potatoes
This is my second time using lentils as a meat replacement and I’m definitely a fan.
This recipe could’ve saved a chicken last week because I was hungry for meatballs and I will sometimes go ‘off roading” from my usual vegetarian lifestyle and eat bacon or ground chicken breast, which makes wonderful meatballs btw, with the addition of a bit of healthy avocado oil to keep them moist.
I would have made these instead for sure! I have no issue with making substitutes! I do have problems busting them, they have so many icky ingredients in them.
Haha! I loved reading your post! I actually tried to let all of my kids “cry it out’ at one or another when they were somewhere between 9months and a year. Guess what? My kids all were born with DNA that allowed them to cry long enough to get laryngitis, vomit all over their beds, pjs, and have faces full of snot and traumatized all of us! And in the end, I’d go in, making the standoff all useless and cruel, comforting them, cleaning them up, rocking them to sleep and then holding them all night, (what was left of it) in the rocking chair, to ease my guilt. For some reason, I’d forget the nightmare when the next reluctant sleeper came along. Of four children, three hated sleeping. And surely didn’t like putting themselves to sleep. I feel every frazzled nerve in your body girl! I can’t believe after the first I was gullible enough to think it would get easier!
Bacon gets me too.
We had the pre-surgery appointment for Ave yesterday and they told us she has to fast prior. I said that’s not gonna go over well and the nurse suggested I just scoop Ave up from her slumber and whisk her off to her surgery that day without waking her. Just let her sleep. The Hubby and I both started laughing. We said yeah, our kid isn’t going to go from crib to car seat without waking up. Ha!
Meghan recently posted…Vegetarian Lentil Meatballs
Haha! That nurse either has NO CHILDREN, or one miracle child that sleeps! (I did get one, my third..shoulda stopped there, but I got cocky) and my third was the worst! He managed to not sleep hardly at all! A 5 minute catnap gave him hours of irrational grumpiness, and demanding to be held, walked, bounced, and then of course all smiles making me look the huge liar for any company who showed up to give me a break!
They do have an uncanny knack to appear all sweet and innocent when company comes. Crazy little critters. 🙂
Soooo… you like dense little balls, eh? HAHAHAHA!
They do look lovely. And I’d totally use your boob as a pacifier.
Laura @ Sprint 2 the Table recently posted…Egg Muffins with Turkey Sausage & Asparagus
I’m telling Vegas. 😉
Meghan recently posted…Vegetarian Lentil Meatballs
Ok, ‘eating crow’ is not a term I am familiar with at all! In fact I had to google it. So I have had a little mini English lesson this morning (we tend to use the term ‘eat my words’). Always good to learn something new!
I cannot wait to make this! Once the Open is over I think David and I will make it on a Saturday night, with a glass or two of red… Heaven. I love my meat but you just gotta love the taste and texture of lentils. 🙂
Jen @ Chase the Red Grape recently posted…Why you don’t have to be like me #5TTT
It definitely goes well with red wine. 🙂
Meghan recently posted…Vegetarian Lentil Meatballs
oh yes these look like they will be so perfect for a meal in the near future.
i eat crow all the time, usually at dinner time. sometimes with lunch. it’s packed with protein but a bit bitter.
i used to say i wouldn’t be a single parent and sometimes i find myself sitting alone wondering if i kept that, but that’s not true of course. graduation is coming soon and i really just can’t wait…
i said so many things that i do now. it’s too much. i said i would NOT drink coffee after the baby was born and that went out the window within 8 hours. i said i wanted her to sleep with me for 3 years and she wanted her own bed within 2 weeks. i guess she’s not a fan of mommy’s bed, ok. i said i will never lose my patience or raise my voice in front our baby and that’s bullshit because i have to yell at DJ the dog every day so he won’t eat his own leash. he doesn’t understand unless you yell, which came from his dad. i’m the stepmom and yes i place all the blame.
love you and can’t wait to eat some crow together. happy friday lady lentil cakes!
danielle recently posted…WIR sleep less play more
Well said. Crow is packed with protein but a bit bitter, and I can’t wait to eat it with you too!!
P.S. I’ve yelled in front of the baby. I’ve kind of even yelled a little bit at the baby. Thank goodness they’re forgiving little things. 😉
Meghan recently posted…Vegetarian Lentil Meatballs
I heart this post so much!
Can’t wait to try the meatballs!!
I heart you.
Oh the things we swore before we became mom’s. Bring on all of the garlic! As for eating crow… yeah… I don’t think there’s a mom who hasn’t.
Thanks for recipe.
Anne Kepner recently posted…Best Proform Rowing Machine – Proform 440R Rower Review
I suspect I’ll be eating crow from here until the end of time now. 🙂
Meghan recently posted…Week in Review: The Momentous Edition (#75)
I am so excited for this recipe. As is Stefan by the way. I have firm plans to make your balls some time next week 🙂 I picture putting them on a sandwich!
I am not a fan of meat replacements either. I feel like when you decide not to eat meat than deal with it. But I also think making meatballs out of lentils doesn’t fall under that category necessarily. A veggie burger isn’t per se a replacement for a meaty one either in my opinion. They just happen to come in the same shape so for a lack of a better name you call them the same.
As for eating crow, I am super guilty. I am so quick with saying ‘I would NEVER EVER….’ and then turning around and doing the exact thing ;-P That’s life. You always have to figure out what works for you when you’re in the situation. The road to hell is paved with good intentions…
Juli@1000lovelythings recently posted…Week in Review – On Procrastinating Professionally
I can’t wait to hear what you and Stefan thick of the meatless meatballs. Irony at its finest.
Meghan recently posted…Week in Review: The Momentous Edition (#75)
Only you could throw talk about juicy fruit-flavoured condoms into a recipe post ;). We’ll call it a side of sexual education, eh?
Much like you I don’t really care for fake meat whatever, not even tofu. These balls, though? You hit the meatless meatball jackpot and I’ll take a plate of them with extra sauce because that one looks particularly good, too. Any sauce secrets?
Miss Polkadot recently posted…Good good links #181
I like that. Vegetarian Lentil meatballs with a side of sexual education. 😉
The sauce recipe is next on my list.
Meghan recently posted…Week in Review: The Momentous Edition (#75)
Never say never! What kind of lentils do you use? I think I have red hanging out in my pantry but I believe not all lentils are created equal?
Great question and thanks for mentioning it. I’ll update the recipe.
The lentils were green.
The amount of garlic in this recipe is perfect! I never understand when I see a recipe that serves 6 and uses only 1 clove of garlic.
I ate crow when I said I couldn’t be with a man who is a picky eater. Guess who really can’t choose who you fall in love with. 😛
Some things really are out of our control. 🙂
I love lentils so I’m sure I’d dig these meatless meatballs!
Haha, I’m sure that most parents could relate to eating crow when it comes to pre-mommyhood notions. Hmm I do remember saying that I would NEVER let my dog lay on the couches, but when she was a puppy she whined and whined to sit up by us, so we compromised and let her lay on the footrest when it’s up and we’re sitting on it. Never say never right?? 😉
Nicole @ Foodie Loves Fitness recently posted…Mediterranean Barley Stuffed Peppers
Whether it’s kids or animals, they get ya every time. 🙂
Meghan recently posted…Week in Review: The Momentous Edition (#75)
Thank you for this lovely recipe Meghan. I love lentils, eating lentils regularly can increase the amount of protein and fiber consumed in the diet. Also, many vitamins and minerals are present in significant amounts in lentils. So, adding lentils to your diet is an excellent idea for a healthy diet. Lentils are low in fat, so they can be used is cases of chronic diseases such as diabetes and cardiovascular problems. Cooking lentils is not difficult. As a matter of fact they cook fast due to their smaller size (compared to other legumes).
Cheers then.
Yup, all great reasons to eat more lentils.